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Feeling In Between: Living Between Two Worlds (by Leigh Sheldon)

  • Writer: Leigh Sh
    Leigh Sh
  • Jun 4
  • 3 min read

Have you ever felt caught between two worlds—like you belong to both, and neither?


Many people I work with describe this exact feeling:


“I love my culture. Ceremony and language keep me grounded—but being with my family is so hard.” “I’m not part of the cultural world, but I don’t want to be fully in the Western one either.”


This experience of in-between-ness is something so many of us carry. We walk in multiple worlds—Indigenous and Western, ancestral and colonial, kinship and individualism—and trying to be in both can be exhausting.


Some systems we move through—education, health care, child welfare—were meant to help but often end up causing harm. They don’t understand our stories. They weren’t built for our healing.


A Pathway Forward: Two-Eyed Seeing

One model I’ve found deeply helpful is the Two-Eyed Seeing approach by Elder Albert Marshall. It invites us to:


“See with one eye the strengths of Indigenous knowledge, and with the other eye the strengths of Western knowledge… and to use both eyes together, for the benefit of all.”


This model honors both worlds. It doesn’t ask us to choose. It asks us to integrate—to hold the tension, and the wisdom, of both.


Facing Relational Trauma

With our “Western eye,” we must acknowledge the trauma Indigenous people have experienced—and still experience—because of colonialism. It's not just historical. It’s present. It’s woven into our relationships, our families, and even ourselves.

This is relational trauma—when the people we love are also the ones who hurt us.

“I love you, but I don’t feel safe with you.”

This kind of trauma can show up as:

  • Feeling like an imposter in your own identity

  • Constantly being on guard—even with people you trust

  • Struggling with intimacy or connection

  • Feeling like you don’t fully belong anywhere


When we’re raised in households full of stress, without safety or validation, we carry that tension into adulthood. It becomes hard to trust, to rest, to be.


Culture as Medicine

But there’s good news: our culture already holds the medicine.

The red road, our traditional teachings, our practices—beading, drumming, tanning—are not just cultural expressions. They are relational teachings. They show us how to:

  • Be present with ourselves

  • Heal by using our hands, heart, and spirit

  • Move with care, intention, and kindness


When we bead, we learn patience.When we tan, we learn where our energy is.When we sit in circle, we learn how to hold space for others—and for ourselves.

These teachings bring us back to ourselves. They teach us how to be in right relationship—first with us, then with others.


The Pain of Community Disconnection

Even with cultural tools, it can still be hard. The effects of colonization live in our communities too:

  • Lack of access to healing

  • Disconnection from land and language

  • Lateral violence, favoritism, cliques, division



So, How Do We Do It?

We begin by asking gentle questions:

  • Where is my energy today?

  • What teachings am I carrying right now?

  • How can I be in better relationship—with myself, with others, with the land?


We remind ourselves that we don’t need to choose between worlds. We can walk with both eyes open. We can gather what heals and leave behind what harms.

We can be part of culture—even if our family is still healing. We can find our place—even if we weren’t raised with the language or ceremony. We can root ourselves in intention and spirit—even if others don’t understand our path.


My Own Journey

In the Indigenous world:I’ve had to let go of the idea that I need to know everything to belong. I wasn’t raised with all the teachings or language—but my heart walks the circle with integrity. When others judge or question my identity, I remind myself:


That need for control or judgment is their protection. My belonging doesn’t depend on their approval. I trust the spirit of the circle—and my own intentions.

In the Western world:I’ve had to face the internalized trauma of being Indigenous in spaces not built for me. I used to feel self-conscious or unworthy. Now I know:

I deserve space. I deserve safety. I deserve to be in relationship—just like anyone else.


To Those Who Feel In Between


You're not alone. Your path is sacred. Your questions are valid. And your healing is possible.


The world may try to pull you in opposite directions, but you are allowed to weave both into something whole—something beautiful.

You are living proof that it’s possible to carry two worlds in one heart.

 
 
 

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Treetops
LAND ACKNOWLEDGMENT 

We acknowledge that we gather on the traditional territories of Treaties 4, 6, 7, and 8 on Turtle Island—ancestral land of many Nations, including the Blackfoot Confederacy (Kainai, Piikani, Siksika), Cree, Dene, Saulteaux, Nakota Sioux, Stoney-Nakoda, Tsuu T’ina, and the Métis Peoples.

We honour the deep connection of these Nations to the land, and our shared responsibility to protect and respect Mother Earth. We pay tribute to the ancestors, the children, the missing and murdered Indigenous women and men, and all those who rest here.

We recognize the ongoing journey of healing and the shared duty of all treaty people. We stand in solidarity with those present, forgotten, and lost, and seek guidance and wisdom from the land.

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